All we hear is Sunita gaga, Sunita googoo

Why? Why is it that we Indians rush to embrace the achievements of any NRI's nay even a person with a tenuous connection with India as ours? Don't we have enough of ur own achievements to boast of? For a billion+ country its a one big fucking shame then!

Consider this. How can a person born, brought up and finally settled in the US, born to an Indian Father and a Slovekian mother be considered Indian? And so Indian that students are making sand sculptures, schools are holding special prayers and thousands of brain-dead idiots are sending SMS texts to news channels saying 'Sunita Bharat Ko Tumpe Garv Hai. Tum Bharat Kee Shaan Ho' (Sunita, India is proud of you. You are the pride of India).

She's not Indian! Fucking reflected glory hounds.

Serial killer

I was watching the news yesterday and was interested in a 'Breaking News' on the Aaj Tak Tez channel. A middle aged woman died of a massive heart attack in Patna, Bihar. Reason - The lead protagonist (Tulsi) of her favorite soap (Kyuki Saas Bhi Bahu Thi) was going to go through a make over (Gautami Kapoor replaces Smriti Irani as Tulsi).

Doesn't the episode shed a new light on the phrase 'Serial Killing'. Another rather hilarious thing attached to the drama was that one of the callers suggested that "I used to watch these serials a few years back. They get too emotional. They should regulate the amount of emotion that can be shown in a soap".... Imagine right after the fourth tear, the screen goes black quoting - "Your tear quota for the day is finished. Please watch some happy serials before you can weep again."

We really need the third world war. Too many humans around. Phbbt....

Yoda of the corporate jungle

I bow to you o Wally. Master of Shirk.

But according to this article, the enemy is on to us. We must resist the dark side and change tactics...

Slipping into a comma

,

Very recently Rajasthan and pretty much a lot of North India was engulfed in political violence. The Gujjar tribesmen wanted special reservation privileges as the Meena community. Two men died in the violence. How is all this related to a comma? Read on...

At present, my job needs me to scan truckloads of business newspaper to track developments in a certain industry. While scanning I came across this piece of information in the Economic Times. While setting up the reserved category list, the SC/ST Commission decided to give the reserved status to the 'Bhil Meenas', a fringe impoverished community based in remote Rajasthan. However some meticulous bastard typed 'Bhil, Meena' in the reserved list.... Does that make your jaw drop? Heart sink? Brain frazzle? .... Exactly!

Read the full article here: How Meenas got ST status
To read more about contemporary Meena history click here

Sleepy Train and Curls

Those who saw the Analyst comic, well the Analyst gets a face, three in fact. Planning to start a new comic centred around three protagonists - Sleepy, Train and Curls. Here is a preview. Hopefuly will expand to more. Till then.... zzzzzzzwappp.... whezzzamycoffee?

Mondays are over rated

When people talk about the Monday morning blues and the horror of it all, I happen to find it a little too dramatic. I must confess though that I too have indulged in the melodrama from time to time. But I think Monday is not the worst day of the week. It is Wednesday. Wednesday is where you find your will to live drained out of you. A lonely little you right between an ocean of work. To put it in a more fun(tm) way, let's make a little analogy shall we? Let's compare a week with a drinking binge.

Saturday - Party has started.. You are coolly sipping Vodka and lime
Sunday - Party in full swing.. You are bloody high and feel slightly sick with so much alcohol in your system
Monday - Party is over you are on your way to home
Tuesday - You are too drunk and are unfocused and are falling asleep right near the toilet sink where you might throw up
Wednesday - Your brain is five sizes too big. The world is swimming. Your back hurts because of dozing off in a weird angle. You are brutally hungover.
Thursday - You are puking.
Friday - Hangover is nearly out of the system, you are nursing a glass of warm lime water and counting your losses

Repeat.....

Micromanaged hell

I recieved a most fun mail from my manager a few days back. I couldn't stop laughing for a straight half hour. Being a nice and cheery person I am, I'd like to share this power packed dose of hilarity with you, dear gentle reader.

"Hi Team,

Off-late, I have observed that many of you chat with your friends through IM and desk phone.

Please note that these facilities have been provided ONLY for official use and their usage for personal purposes should be minimized.

In addition, also try to minimize the time spend in taking personal calls on mobile phones.

If any of you have any issues, please feel free to talk to me.

Thanks and regards,
XXX"

I think we'll soon get a mail telling us how not to use the washrooms or the cafeterias or breathe....

"Hi Team,

I have observed that you breathe entirely too much. From now on you are only allowed to gasp and hold your breath. You are allowed only 6 breaths every minute.

If you feel faint or can see a light guiding you to dead relatives, feel free to contact me.

Thanks and best regards,
But-Hed (Manager)"

For more dilbert, click here